Saturday, March 27, 2010
Kids and Church
I posted recently about children and parental concerns about their behaviour in church. My next dilemma is considering the pastor's kids at church. My husband has been in pastoral ministry since before we started having children, and our son is now old enough to start questioning why he needs to go to church. Sometimes (usually when he is tired), he says church is boring and that he doesn't want to be there.
Most families who are regular church attenders have Sundays when they don't attend church, but as the pastor's family, we go unless we are away on holidays. I have never questioned this or regretted it. I enjoy our church family and am involved in regular ministries on Sundays. But it means that our kids don't get any choice about going to church.
Generally, they like going to church. They have friends there, they participate and often have fun. But I have begun to think that it would be good for my son to be able to choose not to go to church occasionally. On reflection, I've decided that I want him to have some sense of control over attending.
On one hand, as a family, we attend church regularly. On the other hand, each of our children will gradually develop their own lives and families and face choices of their own about church. This is complicated by the fact that their father works for the church. There will always be a tension between leading our children to make right choices and allowing them to search out their own reasons to make decisions.
Ultimately, I need to trust God, that as we teach and pray for our children, and as they grow in their relationship with Jesus, that they will make the choices that I want them to. And I need to prepare for the possibility that they may not do things my way, or even God's way. I pray that they will (follow God's way), but trying to maintain too much control will cause problems.
It is hard to trust God with something that matters to me this much.